Hair Triggers

One thing I don’t play about is my hair. I’m so serious. I can tell you every single time since 5th grade when somebody fucked with me and my hair because I don’t forget that type of event! It’s that important to me.

My blood is boiling! Why did I schedule a hair appointment for today at 4:30 pm and show up to see that this woman isn’t even there. There’s a sign on the door that says, “Please call if the door is locked.” I call her MULTIPLE times and the bitch doesn’t answer. I AM LEAVING FOR EUROPE TOMORROW AND I DID NOT PLAN ON WEARING MY HAIR NATURALLY!! The purpose of getting braids was so that I didn’t have to worry about my natural hair getting frizzy in the Dublin rain. Furthermore, I wouldn’t have to carry a ton of hair products.

I don’t even have a plan b. Had I known that might have happened, I would have contacted my regular stylist to at least get a professional roller set. I think about my options, but there aren’t many. Nobody is doing hair on a random Tuesday evening in April. If I knew where she lived I’d go knock on her door. Do my hair or catch these hands!

How dare she!! To make matters worse, I spoke to her the day before because she accidentally called me, and she knew she had an appointment today. How hard is it to keep your appointments straight? How hard is it to see what appointments you have for the day and be at your shop ready to collect your high ass fee? I want to give you my money and you do me like this. I want to support small businesses. Really I do, but sometimes people don’t even know how to properly maintain a customer base. How are you going to no call/no show to your own appointment? How are you going to destroy an opportunity to make money to support yourself? Cameroonians are voted off my island.

Top it all off, her salon is located on one of the busiest streets in the city. She had me driving in afterwork traffic for nothing. That’s enough to get you killed. I’m sitting in traffic trying to think positive thoughts, but I’m too furious.

I go home, and decide that I have to do my own hair. Never mind the fact that I washed it last night in preparation for today’s braiding affair. I have to wash it again since it’s sort of puffy and frizzy because I didn’t sit under the dryer and let it dry completely. Plus, I didn’t roll it to the best of my abilities. It didn’t matter at the time because I thought I was getting braids.

It takes me three hours to calm down. Like I said, I don’t play about my hair. I pull out my most premium hair products, and careful wash, condition, and style my hair. I bake under the hair dryer for 1.5 hours just like at the hair salon. The only other thing I can do is pray to Madame C.J. Walker that this hair looks somewhat decent during the time I spend in Amsterdam, Bruges, and Dublin. Did I mention that it was my birthday week?!

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