Dating Chronicles: Jerk Off

I had been entertaining a male friend one evening, and he decided to spend the night. I despised overnight guests, and made it a rule to never allow men to spend the night. Things worked best that way because I always felt that spending the night left a door open to the possibilities of other things. Other things were not possible, and I didn’t want anyone to get an misunderstanding. Still, I made an exception for this guy. Actually, it was an unspoken decision between the both of us.

I don’t remember what we did that day, but it exhausted me. We both hopped into the bed at the end of the night. Sex was not involved, but we spooned for a while until I got hot and pushed him off me. This was the summertime and I wasn’t trying to break out into a sweat because of his body heat. We both fell asleep, me on my side with my back facing him. It was common for me to sleep so hard that a party could be happening around me and I wouldn’t know. When I was in Mexico City earlier this year, I slept with the window open while the neighbors across the street had a grand opening celebration of their bar for three days straight. The speakers were blaring with the sounds of music and laughter filled the air, but I still had a good night’s sleep. Similar to those nights in Mexico City, I was dead asleep this particular night.

I was awakened later in the night by movements in the bed. The movements had a pattern, and it took me a moment to realize it was coming from him. It felt like he may have been unconsciously and restlessly shaking his leg in his sleep. I didn’t even open my eyes, but I thought he was asleep. Since my back was facing him, I reached behind me and gently pushed him to get him to stop moving. I didn’t say a word, but he understood what that push meant. He stopped moving. Satisfied with the tranquility of the bed, I repositioned myself by turning around to face his direction and immediately fell back into a deep slumber.

 

After an uncertain amount of time had passed, I was awakened to the same movements again. This time I was a bit more cognizant of what was happening. I lay in the bed silently with my eyes closed, trying to use my other senses to determine what was happening. The patterns of the shaking seemed familiar now. We had masturbated next to one another once before, and I was perplexed when I saw how fast he stroked his penis. I had never witnessed a guy’s hand move so quickly when pleasuring himself. He was like the Usain Bolt of penis stroking. It took the strength of his full arm to get that type of speed. The speed and rhythm at which he stroked his penis back then matched the speed and rhythm of the current bed shaking.

Since I was facing his direction, I opened my eyes and noticed his phone in his hand with the screen lit. I assumed he was watching porn with his phone on silent mode. He was going at it with his other hand just as I remembered from the time we masturbated together. Any other woman would have been offended since he could have easily rolled over and had access to a vagina, but I understood the idea of wanting to enjoy oneself alone and without the added pressure of pleasing someone else. Sometimes, a person just wants to unload one on his own. I didn’t take his decision personally and I didn’t assume he was doing it because I was lacking in any way. We did not have sex that night, but I don’t remember if there was a reason for it.

There was no problem with him enjoying porn and pleasuring himself. I just didn’t want my sleep to be disrupted. He could have gone in the next room. Better yet, he could have gone to the home where he paid a mortgage! I wasn’t his girlfriend, so he had no reason to be in my bed in the first place. I added this to a list of reasons why friends of benefits should not spend the night.

Instead of saying something, I just reposition myself in the bed. He panicked when he saw that I was awake, hid the phone quickly, and pretended to be asleep. Why was he playing possum? I was too tired to care about the reason.

I fell asleep quickly and the entire night was a distant memory by the time I woke up the next morning. When I finally recalled the night, I thought may have been a dream. Then I wasn’t so sure. Then I concluded it was real. As I replayed the night in my head, I determined that he probably wasn’t even watching porn. If he was, he wouldn’t have been so jumpy when he noticed that I was awake the second time. My only guess was that he was sexting with another woman or he was ashamed of the freaky porn he was watching. I never asked him about it so I never got an answer. More than anything I just thought he was rude for interrupting my sleep.

Tune in next month for more dating chronicles.

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